For Better or For Worse...

Ok, so I just found out earlier this week that my ex-husband is getting/got married. LOL I had been hearing rumors that he was going to get married to a little girl etc. but he's been asking everyone that he's dated since we've got our divorce, so I didn't think it was for real this time... LOL! Well it was. ANYWAYS, things just kept getting better from there. For any of you who don't know when we got married it was January 24th, well Brad and his fiance/wife decided that they were going to get married literally the Saturday before. (That is literally 7 days before the 24th) I found this amusing for two reasons. One because I know SOMEWHERE in the conversation of them deciding what day it was going to be the topic came up about "Well what about the 24th" and there was a big hell no, OORRR he just didn't tell her what day we were married. (Which leaves the honor to me :D haha I'll get to that later.


Well, as the week went on I hear where exactly they are getting married, turns out to be the building right in front of where Brad and I use to live. LOL! Who the FREAK does that!?! I guess them... So then the week progresses... Day before the wedding Shonda gives me a ring and tells me about how they have now put the announcement on the marquee at Wendy's. Let me say that again for those of you who didn't get that.... eh hem.... WEEENNNDDDYYYY'SSS!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! Maybe, they shoulda thought about havin' their nuptials through the pickup window!

Oh my gads, I have never laughed so hard in my life! They went through the trouble of stickin' each letter up there, but couldn't even put their picture in the newspaper where all the rest of the normal people in the world stick their announcement! Have I mentioned lately how DUMB it was to marry this guy and how smart it was to DIVORCE him?!?

Ok so as many of you know, Brad refuses to get himself off of my bank account that I've had since I was little, and I refuse to close it (because it's MY freakin' account!) So I took it upon myself to write his new bride. Askin' her nicely since now they are married that maybe she could do something about his refusal. I also may or may not have mentioned the wedding date being so close to ours and the place of marriage being so oddly close to where we made our home. So, I've gone off on tangents a couple times about this to different people, but only because I think it's SOOO ridiculous! IF I ever decide to get married again, you can sure bet the farm that I'm not going to have it in anyway similar to my last wedding OR if I'm getting married to another divorcee will I make it anything similar to HIS last wedding. Not in the same month, not the same town (let alone the same block), not the same COLORS... EW!

This only now leaves me to assume that because he doesn't feel the same way about that, that he's not quite over the whole thing like we would hope him to be. I mean, at first I only had the bank account and his refusal to take his name off of it after 4 freaking years, but now all this?? Are you serious???? Wow. Move on and quit trying to re-live whatever it is you think we had. Because whatever it was, was a huge MISTAKE.

There's probably some people out there readin' this wondering why I'm even bothering to write something about this, well here's your answers:

#1~ It's freakin' hilarious!!!!

#2~ Because I still have to deal with the idiot! I make truck payments for him (not willingly mind you) Get calls on my cell phone from bill collectors asking where he's at and how to get a hold of him because he can't pay his bills

#3~ Hear stories constantly from everyone about HE divorced ME when I have legal paperwork stating ME as the petitioner and him as the respondent, and fabricated stories about what caused our whole divorce...

#4~ One of the main reasons I moved away from home, away from my friends, was because he was stalking me everywhere I went after our divorce was final. Whenever I talked to guy's, he thought he needed to pull up next to me and stare down whomever I was talking to. Or he would constantly drive by the house in his mom's suburban (ya know, because I we had been married for over a year and I didn't know what his mom drove.) Which, I should have realized he would do because he did the same thing when we were just dating, and had broken up because he was being controlling.

#5~ Because I want everyone to know what kind of a bullet I dodged BY divorcing him. Most everyone knows, but it's also a good thing for me to hear every now and again because I DID go through hell with him, I had never been so depressed as when I was with him, nor have I since. Not because I didn't want to be with him, but because he made me feel so badly about myself that I thought he was all I deserved. All I could get.

I thought he was my only chance at happiness. He stripped me from my friends, from my family. I was cut off from everything that I had known and only allowed to see things through his eyes. Only go to his friends and families houses. We fought physically ALL the freakin' time. He was the most controling person I have ever met. I wasn't even allowed to work until we started hurting for money. He called me the worst names that I now hear other people using today, and it just makes me cringe. I would have stayed in that horrible environment had I not started talking to Shonda again behind his back at first. She gave me the strength to stand up to him when it came to what I wanted. She gave me the strength to even notice that there was a way out, and that I could do it. Even if he was my only chance at happiness, I wasn't even happy. She gave me the strength to get the papers ready and signed to get away from all that.

I'm not gonna lie, I still have issues that I need to work out after all that. I'm definitely NOT the same person I was when I was married. I don't let people walk all over me anymore. I don't let guys make me feel guilty for anything anymore, I don't tolerate being called names. I do however think the only thing I have a problem with is commitment issues. I just can't get close to anyone, when I know there is a chance at something working out. Mainly because I don't want to give up who I am for someone else again, and I shouldn't have to. Your husband/wife should add to who you are, not take away from it. They are an extension of who you are and what you believe in, they aren't your identity. And until that happens, until I find someone that the opposite doesn't happen when we are only dating...I won't settle down. I won't lessen who I am just to make someone else happy. It's my life, I've only got one, and I'm living it the best that I think I can. That may change from day to day, but as long as it's what I want... then that's all that should matter.

Besides that Adelman is going to support me until I'm old and gray anyways, he doesn't know this...but he will soon enough :P HAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

New Year = New Plans

So here it is the start of 2009 and I have a few New Years Resolutions I've set for myself. Not something I want to make the topic of discussion, but something important to me none the less. I went out with friends last night Hopefully drinking for the last time.

One of my resolutions it to stop drinking. I've basically become an alcoholic and I'm not proud of it. When you wake up in the morning craving a beer for breakfast, it's not a good sign. I've cut back a ton since October, but now is the time to cut it off completely because if I don't I'm afraid I will never be able to. I never thought this would be an issue for me, but obviously it has become one and it needs to be taken care of. That, and it's not helping with my desire to be 123 pounds... LOL So it's a win win kinda situation I guess. Haha.


A couple weeks ago, Tyra and I went out to Trolley Square to the Logan House. We were just going out for a regular GNO (Girls Night Out) and ended up wondering what the crap all the santa gear was about... We're kinda oblivious to local happenings I guess, because it was the Santa Crawl.

We got our picture taken and stuck in Spark Magazine. It was kinda funny when we were at the gym the next week and had people coming up to us sayin' they saw us. Haha. good times. The hats we were wearing weren't even ours. We confiscated them from random guys.

After we got done there we went to a 24hr diner to have some breakfast. Tyra was so messed up and almost fell out of her seat on the ride over there. lol We had great entertainment while eating though. Some 60 year old guy there was playing the jukebox and dancing like no one was watching...but we were...and laughing...hard. I haven't seen something that funny in a long time. He was all by himself and toasted, but havin' the time of his life!!

Ok, on to other things. I got a text day before yesterday from the Turbo that called me high maintenance. I didn't know who it was because I freakin' deleted his number. Why wouldn't he delete mine??? He wants to get together again, and I told him only on one condition... He doesn't talk about sex. He said ok, but we'll see. Dude is effed up like Polio.

I called a Psychic yesterday...hahaha... I got a $20.00 coupon in the mail and decided to make it worth my while... Apparently I am one of few people who is destined to be with one person for my whole life. This 'one person' I will be meeting in the Spring, possibly early May. I'll tell ya what... I'll wait for May, and if it doesn't happen, I'm not so sure I'm gonna believe the Psychic the next time I call.

I haven't seen little man for a couple days, I think tomorrow I will make my way over there to chew on his cheekers. He prolly misses me :D haha.

FINALS!

Ok, so technically I should be studying for my Math final, but I just can't. I'm so freakin' tired right now and besides that i'm a huge procrastinator... Yay me. Ugh. I didn't think I would be so sick of school by the end of the semester...and it's not even that I'm sick of it... I just need this break... BAD.

So, besides that, are you ready to be proud of me? I've been going to the gym. I've prolly already mentioned that before, but either way...I'm stickin' it out. Tyra is such an awesome friend... We have so much fun when we go, checkin' out all the hot guys... LOL especially that handsome muscular tattooed one... mmmhmmm... she has to show me the one she likes on Sunday... lol We keep talking about how we are going to grab his little notebook that he brings with him to the gym to right down his workout I guess, and just jot down our numbers... LOL That would be a great time! I've lost a total of 5 pounds now in less then 2 weeks...

Hopefully this weight loss keeps up. I

feel like I'm turning anorexic though. I mean even with my great love of food. I just look at it now and I think to myself it's not even worth it, and I end up closing the fridge. Either that or i will snack on a Veggie. Ugh I hate veggies, but I guess my stomach has to be full right? Subway will never escape me though...lol I love it WAY to much and can NEVER turn that down! lol

Anyways, here is a picture of little man and I hangin' 'a' christmas ornament on the tree... Have I mentioned how much I love his squishy little face, and butt, and thighs, and arms, and NECK!!!! lol Alright, off to study.... HA!

High Maintenance???

What. The. Crap!!

I'm sorry, but I don't think that I am. High Maintenance I mean. Oh I am SOOO done with this creeper! I have never been so infuriated with someone that I hardly know... OHHHH YAAAA.... Believe it. He totally passes up 'Muscles Matt' BY far! At least Matt had a reason for being pissed off, I mean not getting a kiss after a date can hurt even the most egocentric of men; but THIS guy... is something else. You would think him being in the Secret Service that he would HAVE to be normal... but noooooo.... that's asking too much from a guy I do believe.

I don't even think this man knew how to flirt! Seriously...who goes from going out for a cup of coffee to "Hey, I'm feeling horny are you?" IN ONE DAY!!! ONE!!! Ugh. The sad part is that he had such potential! He had a sense of humor, and looks, and... oh gads...a hot ass freakin' job!!! Just seeing that wire to his ear just about made me forget how much of a creep he was! HAHA! And he had to ruin it all... with his personality. WTF. Anyways, today he couldn't take a joke and basically freaked out on me. He told me I was High Maintenance. HAHAHA! Me? Of all people? Ya oook... I will forgive you for that because you don't know me too well; but I just can't get over how much of a drama queen YOU are...and I'm done.

Having that said... I got my hair did!!! I colored my hair :D LOL Yes, again... and....drumroll please...... I layered it... Ya. I know.... Big deal. HUGE deal. Right? Here's a picture:

YEAH HAA HA! Of course you have NO idea how excited I am that I was able to figure out how to post this picture up... (with Nicole's help of course) :P LOL!

Ok, now... on to more important things. I've been going to the gym for awhile now and actually keeping it up thanks to the Y.M.C.A. and my girlie Tyra :D !!!! I do have to say I'm pretty proud of myself ;) haha. Tuesday we started our Kickboxing class!

Next week marks my last week for this semester. That means finals. Right now I have an 'A' in both of the classes (Chemistry and Math) Hopefully it stays that way after the finals. I've already signed up for next semester: Math 135, Chem 110, and PSY 121. LOL We'll see how that goes. ;)

Alright, that's about all I have to say for today... Nothin' really funny happened but I needed to vent a little about Turbo Nuts, and I felt this was a fantastical place to do it.

So there you have it. And because I'm still excited about being able to post that picture... here's one of little Monkey Man and I today :D I love his little chubby CHEEKERS!!!

It's my first time....

Okay, so being the big 'Band Wagon Jumper' that I am, I figured why not start up a blog too... YAY! Everyone out there does this blog thing for their little families that they've started or have had for awhile, well being that I tried to go down that road once and it didn't work out so well, you guys are just going to have to deal with this being All Londa, All The Time! Who's excited?! I know I am!

I will try and keep you updated on the hilarity's of my life on a monthly if not weekly basis. I know I know, you're all excited about what I'm about to throw down here... but bring your calm down a notch and relax... It will be everything you hoped for and more. I promise.

Basically everyone that cares to read this already knows who I am and what I'm about, sooo... if you were looking for the whole "October 11th 1983~ On a dark cold Tuesday night. I. Am. Born." Then I have already broken my promise, and failed your expectations of what this blog will be about, and you should probably stop reading right about..............now.